Parental experiences and perspectives on supporting LGBTQ+ children during coming out: a qualitative study

Abstract Background When confronted with their child’s coming out as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or queer (LGBTQ+), parents often experience emotional, social, and informational challenges in their role as supporting parents. This qualitative study aims to collect shared experiences which may be helpful for other parents in similar situations. Methods We conducted three focus groups in Austria with parents ( N = 23) of LGBTQ+ children. Participants were parents of transgender, gender nonconforming, and cisgender children with diverse sexual orientations with at least some routine in supporting their child’s development in terms of sexual orientation and/or gender identity. The focus groups solicited short- and long-term experiences with the aim of providing recommendations to other parents in similar situations. Discussions were guided by semi-structured questions and analysed using framework-driven thematic analysis. Results Findings revealed several key aspects of parental support. Regarding responses to a child’s coming out , parents emphasized the relevance of maintaining open communication, providing affirmation and a sense of safety, and seeking peer or professional support. Managing the social environment , which involved defending the child in social contexts and fostering self-confidence, was considered crucial for positive development. In the context of gender transition , parents highlighted prioritizing the child’s well-being and seeking reliable information. Finally, key messages to other parents focused on reflecting their own mindset to allow the letting go of heteronormative expectations and preconceived ideas about the child’s future. Parents emphasized the relevance of allowing oneself as a parent enough time for the adaption process. Conclusion Parental support is crucial for the mental health of LGBTQ+ children. The focus group discussions revealed rich experiences and insights from parents of LGBTQ+ children, with specific practical recommendations for other parents in similar situations.