The academic safari: A field guide to conference survival

The academic safari: A field guide to conference survival is a satirical exploration of the modern academic conference, portraying it as a richly populated ecosystem governed by rituals, hierarchy, jargon, and performative scholarship. Through humorous observations of beginner, mid-career, and senior academics, it exposes familiar behaviours-from strategic networking and ceremonial visibility to interminable questions and buffet diplomacy. While playfully highlighting the contradictions and absurdities of conference culture, the essay ultimately acknowledges that these gatherings endure because they satisfy fundamental human needs for belonging, recognition, and shared professional identity.