Navigating Online Dating: Autistic Adults’ Experiences of Connections, Disclosure, and Safety

Background: Dating apps are a common way to meet partners, yet little is known about how autistic adults use and experience these platforms. Existing studies are few, consist of small samples, and none have specifically focused on disclosure decisions, responses to disclosure, or experiences of victimization. This study examined autistic adults’ use of dating apps, focusing on the connections formed, decisions about disclosing an autistic identity, responses received, and experiences of victimization. Methods: We employed a convergent mixed-methods design, using an online survey to collect quantitative and qualitative data. Eligible participants were autistic adults (professionally diagnosed or self-identified) with experience using dating apps or websites. In total, 102 participants completed the survey. We analyzed quantitative data using descriptive statistics, chi-square tests, and Mann–Whitney U tests. We analyzed qualitative open-text responses through conventional content analysis. Results: Most participants (83.3%) had met someone in person through dating apps, forming long-term (49%), short-term (41.2%), or casual connections (43.1%). More than half (54.5%) chose not to disclose their autistic identity in their profiles, although some disclosed later in interactions. Disclosure was motivated by authenticity, filtering for compatible partners, and avoiding misunderstandings. Reasons for nondisclosure included fear of stigma and safety concerns. Responses to disclosure ranged from acceptance and reciprocal disclosure to stereotyping, ghosting, and stigma. Victimization was widespread: 40% received unwanted sexually explicit messages, and 43% reported verbal abuse. Women and nonheterosexual participants reported significantly higher rates and a greater variety of victimization experiences than men and heterosexual participants. Conclusion: Dating apps provide autistic adults with meaningful opportunities for connection but also expose them to stigma and victimization. Disclosure decisions are shaped by weighing authenticity and safety. Findings highlight the need for safer, more inclusive online dating environments and broader societal efforts to reduce autism stigma.