What does it mean for parents to raise a self-harming adolescent?

Introduction. Self-harm and suicide are pressing public health issues among adolescents. Parents who encounter their child’s self-harm may experience feelings of shame, guilt, inadequacy, and uncertainty about the right course of action or where to seek help. Given that the topics of self-harm and suicide remain highly stigmatized, and parents raising self-harming adolescents often go unnoticed, highlighting and further exploring these issues can not only contribute valuable data for improving support and accessibility but also help reduce stigma. Methods. This qualitative study used semi-structured in-depth interviews analyzed through Interpretative Phenomenological Analysis (IPA) following J. A. Smith. Six mothers raising adolescents aged 10–19 participated. Results. The analysis revealed four meta-themes: 1) “That day, my whole life turned upside down” 2) Inner wounds; 3) “Alone with this child” 4) Transforming wounds into strength. The study highlighted mothers emotional turmoil, deep self-blame, disappointment, and the challenges of raising a self-harming child. Mothers described a difficult and often frustrating search for help, pointing to shortcomings in available services. Over time, however, many mothers experienced a transformation – painful experiences gave way to newfound strength, helping them care for themselves and find meaning in their journey. Conclusions. Mothers raising self-harming adolescents underwent a profound life change marked by emotional pain and uncertainty. Their help-seeking process was ambivalent, marked by both hope and frustration. Despite the hardships, many mothers ultimately transformed their pain into strength. The study identified key support needs: professional competence and attention toward parents, accessible psychological services, and better information about adolescent self-harm, parenting, and parental support.