‘Do existential touchstones really cool?’ An exploration of therapists’ experiencing of significant personal loss and how this informs their ‘way of being’ with a client

This paper reports on a study that explored how person-centered therapists affected by significant personal losses experience existential touchstones, and how these experiences inform their way of being with clients. Using a heuristic inquiry approach, alongside my own heuristic journey, semi-structured interviews were conducted with three person-centered therapists and analyzed thematically. The findings both support and challenge the limited existing literature on therapist grief, suggesting that grief is a unique and identity-shaping experience that can also foster personal growth. Lived loss reshapes therapists’ subjective experiencing within therapeutic encounters. Participants described how their own experiences of loss, when supported by grief education and supervision, deepened their empathy, strengthened relational connections, and enhanced their therapeutic practice. The study highlights how personal grief, when acknowledged and integrated, can become a transformative resource in therapy, underscoring the value of experiential understanding in the development of therapeutic presence and practice.