'Emotions Can Get Me Too’: Autoethnographic and Psychodynamic Perspectives on the artist-researcher’s wellbeing in NHS Paediatrics

Witnessing illness in childhood and hospitalisation can be deeply challenging experiences for researchers, yet the emotional labour involved often remains unspoken. This article explores how one artist researcher navigated the emotional impact of conducting research in paediatrics through arts based autoethnography and reflective practice. Through drawings, journaling, and metaphor, the first author shares her emotional journey during a 4 month research period in a children’s hospital. A psychodynamic therapist offers a series of reflections on the emotional material presented, offering clinical insight into metaphors for emotional safety. Together, this dialogic format provides a model for understanding and supporting emotional wellbeing in challenging research settings. The article concludes that arts-based autoethnographic methods provide a powerful tool for reflection, emotional processing, and knowledge generation. Building on these insights, we introduce a preliminary framework designed to guide researchers working in healthcare and other emotionally sensitive environments through creative and reflective approaches.