You Must Really Love Your Mother

My thesis, You Must Really Love Your Mother, is a documentary that explores the relationship between my mother and grandmother living together on my grandmother’s factory pig farm in rural North Carolina. I was motivated to create this project to document and memorialize a unique chapter in my mom’s life—leaving her career and community in New York City to spend invaluable time with her mother. This documentary takes place a year after both my mom’s step-mom and biological mom were in the ICU at the same time. My mom’s step-mom, Carol, passed away, while her biological mom, Judy, survived and required some caretaking. This project explores the aftermath of this profoundly emotional and painful “wake up call” for my mom 30 years after leaving the south, driving her to move back in with her mom. Through interviews, observational videos, and photography I explore themes of sacrifice, love, rural identities, queerness, and anticipatory nostalgia and grief. My film is about how much my mom must unconditionally love, support, and accept her mother to sacrifice her own comfort by living in such an unforgiving and gross environment.