Surrendering to Risk: A Brief Account of Existentialism, Fear and Art

Some time ago I wrote a short text about creativity and existentialism. I was quite afraid of the idea of taking risks at the time. Uncertainty and senselessness were difficult for me to digest after having had a difficult upbringing. I wanted control and predictability, but I knew I would not get anywhere without risk and discomfort. What follows is that text with a few interjections I make a few years later. Not denying the initial ideas but rather updating them slightly. I still use and read these arguments every time I find existential and political fear paralysing me. Now being one of those moments. In the original text I was very assertive, and I affirmed almost unequivocally that writing, art and creative life in general are the tools humans have against nothingness, helplessness, anguish, nostalgia for home, and ultimately, ghosts. The artist safeguards and protects herself from that nothingness she has been told contains the universe, that precedes it. I still share some of these ideas but struggle to be so confident with anything that comes from a human mind.