Collateral Damage: Qualitative Descriptions of Betrayal, Loss, and Grief Associated with Domestic Violence and the Family System

Recurring themes in domestic violence literature have exposed hidden psycho-social-spiritual aspects accompanying the devastating reality of the many harms, disappointments, and life changes endured by domestic violence survivors. This is not just due to the actual abuses from intimate partners but also from others in near proximity. This article describes the accompanying devastation, whether intentional or not, and from both individuals and institutions, as collateral damage—the additional emotional and social consequences experienced by survivors of domestic violence. Through qualitative responses in a discussion of betrayal, loss, and grief, new insight is brought to the overlap, seriousness, and overall toll of these consequences. In recognizing that collateral damage exists in cases of domestic violence, helping professionals, community partners, and policymakers can repair harm, offer education, strengthen safety measures and protective strategies, and thereby support both the individual survivor and the family system subjected to abuse. This exploratory study aims to expand inquiry within the domestic violence literature and offer avenues of recognition of the compounding issues faced by many survivors and their children.