Is consent as simple as tea? Psychosocial reflections on men’s accounts of sexual violence perpetration

Why do some men sexually assault women? Can their behaviour be explained exclusively through reference to inadequate understandings of consent? Or are more complexly gendered power dynamics in play? In this article I reflect on the narrative accounts provided to me over the last 27 years by men who have disclosed sexual assaults they have perpetrated on women and girls: assaults often perpetrated with impunity, the tellers evading detection, arrest, conviction and, in some cases, without any acknowledgement that what they had done was wrong or illegal. The article calls for a more dynamically psychosocial analysis of how insecurities and trauma inform misogyny and masculinities, alongside an intersectional analysis of which men get criminalised for sexual assaults. It advocates for public engagement strategies that ask men to reflect upon the benefits of being brave and curious enough to ask prospective partners not just what they will consent to, but also what they really want.