Being a parent of a gifted child: The Deliberate Indifference Theory

This theoretical work aims to explain the psychological states of families with gifted children in the field of gifted education. In gifted education, research has primarily focused on the phenomenon of giftedness and the characteristics of gifted individuals. However, the topic of families with gifted children has been somewhat neglected. Especially at the beginning of the 21st century, theorists like Renzulli and Sternberg have emphasized wisdom, which has made environmental and contextual factors important in gifted education. Dabrowski's Theory of Positive Disintegration fills a significant gap in self-psychology and also draws a map to reach the social capital in Renzulli and Sternberg, especially in relation to the overexcitability condition, which is common in gifted individuals. While this is happening, the families of gifted children cannot remain passive. There has been no previous research on the psychological states that families of gifted children go through. The five-stage Grief model proposed for the families of children with autism and intellectual disabilities cannot be applied to the families of gifted children. In this article, I discuss the nine stages that I believe the families of gifted children go through, as mentioned in my previous book. These nine stages are framed as: Surprise, Anxiety About Not Being Able to Meet the Child’s Needs, Facing Reality, The Euphoria of Diagnosis, Seeking Information and Help, Despair and Rebellion, Awareness and Maturity, Relaxation and Automatic Gear, The Desire to Support Others. In these nine stages, the families of gifted children experience changing psychological states due to internal and external factors. Additionally, during the transition from the first to the ninth stage, I noticed that two important psychological constructs work together. These are: Deliberateness (Consciousness) and Indifference. In the first stage, the family of the gifted child exhibits fewer intentional or conscious behaviors regarding the phenomenon, whereas in the final stage, it is at the highest level. Similarly, the "Indifference" state is minimal in the first stage and at its peak in the final stage. In the last stage, the family becomes resolute in a "Deliberate Indifference" state. In this state, the family will make a positive contribution to the gifted child's areas of ability and wisdom development. It is recommended to increase research on the families of gifted children from the perspective of the Deliberate Indifference Theory.