Grief as a Duty of Practical Fidelity

We often feel duty-bound to grieve our loved ones after their deaths. But how can we owe grief (or anything) to those who are no longer alive? We propose that the duty to grieve the deceased is part of a wider duty found in mutually loving relationships, which we call a duty of practical fidelity. The duty of practical fidelity commands us to ‘factor’ our loved ones into our practical identities, while encouraging them to do the same. Fulfillment of the duty requires that we attend to radical changes in their identities – and few changes are more radical than death. We grieve in order to adapt our practical identities to the death of a loved one. Failure to do so wrongs the deceased.