Veiled by Shadows: A Graduate Student’s Tale of Becoming and Dissent in Quest of the Ivory Tower

This paper is a critical reflection on my academic journey as a doctoral student in hospitality and tourism management in the U.S., framed by post-qualitative inquiry and informed by Laurel Richardson and Elizabeth St. Pierre's (2005) concept of writing as a method of inquiry.As Richardson posits, writing is not just a tool for representing knowledge, it is an act of becoming.Through this process, we construct, question, and continuously reshape our identities as researchers.This form of inquiry resists formulaic structures, rejecting the assumption that knowledge can be neatly categorized and captured (Lee, 2025).I used this lens to explore how my own evolving academic identity has been shaped by rigid structures that not only demand, but award, conformity in the increasing neoliberalization of higher education (Lee & Benjamin, 2023).Embracing a narrative approach through a fictional storytelling of my journey allowed me to undertake a reflexive exploration of my experiences.My writing positions my own becoming as an ongoing personal negotiation of meaning within an institution that resists such fluidity.