Parents’ perfectionistic tendencies predicted early relationship skills: Children’s forgiveness as a mediator

Parents have been assumed to play a vital role in children’s interpersonal relationships. However, little is known on whether different expressions of performance expectations by mothers and fathers uniquely contribute to young children’s relationship skills and what the underlying mechanisms are. Considering that forgiveness can facilitate relationship maintenance, this longitudinal study examined whether children’s forgiveness mediated the relations of mothers’ and fathers’ perfectionistic strivings and concerns with young children’s relationship skills. Mothers and fathers of 226 kindergarten children in Hong Kong were recruited to complete a questionnaire at three time points at a 6-month lag between time points. Results of structural equation modeling showed that mothers’ and fathers’ perfectionistic strivings about children’s performance were positively associated with children’s relationship skills via children’s forgiveness. In contrast, mothers’ and fathers’ perfectionistic concerns about children’s performance were negatively associated with children’s relationship skills via children’s forgiveness. These findings imply that it is worthwhile to help both mothers and fathers adopt constructive ways to express their high expectations and remind them of the importance of children’s forgiveness in fostering relationship skills.