To find oneself in existential motion through unfamiliar terrain: a phenomenological Reflective Lifeworld Research study of becoming a parent to a child expressing a transgender or gender diverse identity in Sweden

Background: Parental support is a crucial protective factor for the well-being of transgender and gender diverse (TGD) children and youth. Yet, parents often undergo complex processes before reaching an affirming stance. Aim: This is the first study to explore the experiences of Swedish parents to TGD children. Methods: The study explored Swedish parents’ lived experiences of the phenomenon “becoming a parent to a child expressing a TGD identity” using a Reflective Lifeworld Research (RLR) approach to capture the essence of the phenomenon. Twenty-eight cisgender parents from nineteen families across Sweden participated in in-depth lifeworld interviews. Results: The essence of the phenomenon was to find oneself in existential motion through unfamiliar terrain, further detailed by three constituents: (1) The unsettling of gendered familiarity, (2) Seeking certainty in uncertainty, and (3) Self-reflection and shifting relationships. Discussion: The phenomenon was shaped by cisnormative assumptions, triggering emotional dissonance and conflicting emotions, yet also of hope and recognition. The results highlighted the emotional labor required to support the children while managing internal tensions, as well as the potential for personal gender reflection, understanding, and expression of gender. These findings expand previous international research by emphasizing relational and existential dimensions and by adding experiences from a Swedish context. Conclusion: The study underscores the need for enhanced knowledge about gender diversity, clearer guidelines, and accessible and reflective support systems for parents, fostering space also for emotional processing, relational negotiation, and identity work in the light of cisnormativity. Such systems are vital for promoting the health and resilience of both TGD children, youth, and their families.