“Son, Why Have You Treated Me Like This?”: A Marian View of Miscarriage

The Church loves babies. Christ chose the form of a squalling, red-faced newborn baby as his preferred entry into human life. He drew small toddlers onto his lap. Nearly all churches have some ecumenical mark to celebrate a new baby: baptism, dedication, or simply showering mothers and fathers with meal trains. Like the liturgical season of Advent, pregnancy is a joyful season filled with longing and waiting. Yet the tragic reality is that around twenty percent of pregnancies end in miscarriage. Subverted hopes, dreams, and longings are washed away in a torrent of blood and tears. The taboo of publicly acknowledging miscarriage leaves grieving families largely alone with questions, trauma, and deep pain. What do you do when there is no baby to celebrate? Historically, the Church has entered this question well and comprehensively explored a theology of miscarriage. When it has, it has narrowly sought to address the question of who is at fault for the loss of the child. More recently, some theodicies of miscarriage, primarily from womanist and feminist theologians, have emerged to comfort grieving families and seek God amid this unimaginable suffering. Yet while these scholars have substantially enriched this desperately-understudied topic, one key tenet of a comprehensive theology of miscarriage continually seems missing. Mary, the Mother of God, offers an entry into and path through the grief and loss of women suffering from miscarriages in a uniquely empathetic way. I argue that she is an integral component of crafting a holistic theology of miscarriage to minister to grieving women and prepare the church to respond.