Take A Bow When You Fall

This article is an autoethnography reflecting on my experience as a beginner practicing aikido. It centres around the embodied experience of this martial art: how practices feel to the inexperienced body and the emotional highs and lows accompanying both strength and vulnerability. Following a disjointed narrative that combines experiences over weeks of practice, this autoethnography considers the trust, hierarchy, and gendered expectations that arise and are consequently challenged during training. Violence and the considerations of physical limitations are also taken into account in order to provide a personal description of aikido practice as a woman.