Rupture and repair

During the years of colonial rule in India, the white colonial classes delegated their childcare to Ayahs—or nursemaids—despite regarding them as inferior and less civilised. Marjorie, daughter of colonial parents, traces her early attachment to her Ayah despite her family’s racist attitudes. As World War 2 ended, Marjorie was abruptly removed from her Ayah and brought back ‘home’ to England where she was sent to boarding school following the conformist pathways of a colonial family. Her loss of her Ayah and her feelings of abandonment and being unloved cause her to close down emotionally and focus on surviving. Much later, in her fifties, she began to recognise her own state of emotional dysfunction and sought help with therapy. She was fortunate to meet Nick Duffell who had been developing an understanding of what became known as Boarding School Syndrome. With a group of other former boarders, they formed a support group to help those traumatised by boarding school years to process their feelings. Marjorie assisted many boarders and in doing so reduced her sense of isolation and loss. In the meantime, campaigners had fought to acknowledge the Ayahs who were brought to London to care for their charges on the long sea journey and who were then shown the door and abandoned on the streets of London. A care home was established and this effort to give support has finally been recognised.