“He was not interested in pain”: The experience of pain in child sexual abuse as conveyed by adult survivors

Although extensive efforts have been dedicated to uncovering the close link between trauma and chronic pain, very few research efforts have investigated the lived experience of pain during and following trauma. This study delves into the complex and multifaceted experiences of physical pain among adults who experienced child sexual abuse (CSA), examining 29 detailed testimonies provided to the Israeli Independent Public Inquiry into CSA. Using qualitative thematic analysis, the research identifies and elaborates on three pivotal themes: pain as a distress signal, the internalization of pain, and the intermingling of physical and mental pain. Thus, the study findings capture the immediate physical pain experienced during abusive incidents, which serves as an involuntary alert to the self and, at times, to the broader environment about the trauma being experienced. The findings also explore how this acute response transforms into a chronic state, becoming an embedded part of survivors' daily lives, influencing personal and relational dynamics, often without visible scars but with profound internal implications. Lastly, the findings reveal the blurred lines between the participant's physical and psychological pain, illustrating how they express psychological distress through physical pain symptoms and how this affects their coping mechanisms. The study underscores the necessity of recognizing pain as a complex, enduring component of the CSA survivor's experience, highlighting the need for integrated therapeutic approaches that address the intertwined nature of posttraumatic mental symptoms and physical pain. This study advocates for a more nuanced understanding and acknowledgment of pain in CSA survivors, urging further research and adapted clinical practices to better support their recovery and well-being.