‘As a father, I like to develop and grow’ – fathering and privileges among white, heterosexual & highly educated men in the Netherlands

In this paper, we analyse the understanding of 'good' fathering amongst white, heterosexual, and highly educated men living in the Netherlands with whom we conducted interviews. Their narratives showed that they consider 'good' fathering as a constant learning process, in which they put much emphasis on individualism, spending quality time with their children, and jointly discovering the world. To shed light on the structural factors that enable them to make active choices regarding fathering, we use the lens of privilege. While these fathers are privileged in relation to their gender, sexuality, class, education, ability, language, and ethnicity, the aspects of education, class, sexuality, and ethnicity emerged most prominently in the analysis of our data. Earlier research argued that privileges are often invisible to those who benefit from them. However, our data suggests, in line with recent research, that the privileged are sometimes aware of the benefits they profit from. Moreover, we add to the growing body of literature on privileged fathering in Europe by arguing that these fathers' privileges are not primarily detectable in the advantages they profit from, but rather in the absence of barriers and obstacles they face.